I am a romantic and I can't help it. C'mon, I love romantic comedies, freaky R&B songs, and poetry, a true blue sap. However, I'm trying to train myself to recognize REAL and MEANINGFUL romance instead the kind that only exists in my pretend world. Going back to one of my previous entries about looking at the bigger picture, I just need to keep that idea in mind. I have to keep my over powering romanticizing emotions at bay when I meet someone. Of course everything is awesome in the beginning, everyone is extra careful and has on their best romance mask. I have to remind myself that just because I think they've said something profound or clever that I've never heard before doesn't make them the love of my life. Anyway, I need to slow down this exciting feeling, stretch it out as far as I can to truly get to know the person. Who knows; this person could be putting on a show and saying everything that they know that I want to hear instead of being real. Then later on down the road I figure out they are a fraud, my romantic dream crushed and then it's all down hill from there. Okay, this entry went a little off focus but the point is I'm slowly figuring out that if you can't be yourself with the person that you love, be your real and feel comfortable that this person is enjoying every second of your unique quirks then why the hell are you with them in the first place. I know it's pretty obvious but sometimes I think that I've found a great person to be with but then I realize they don't really know me as much as I thought they did and viceversa. I was too caught up in the beginning part of the relationship. Just stuck on how much they tried to get know me, call me, and want me, that I didn't slow down and figure out if I really even liked them myself. Anyway, once the chase is over, that's the real test to see if there's actually a real future with this person. All in all relationships take a lot of work and are more than just the butterflies and excitement in the beginning. It's about keeping all those feelings alive and figuring out if they are for real. Wow, I will go back to my original purpose of this entry. I basically have a new outlook on what I think love should feel like. How I got to these realizations, well that's a completely different story that isn't quite ready to be revealed to the world wide web as of now. Anyway:
LOVE.
True love is a thrilling feeling
of peace and being able to be my
absolute true self
Knowing the good and bad
but completely sure the good always
outweighs the bad on both sides
It's a safe feeling of being able
to express myself
Knowing for a fact this person
has your back and is always
looking out for my best interest
Sometimes feeling we are
the same person
Reading each other's minds,
finishing sentences, and
just knowing what to say
at the right place and time
Never running out of things to say
or be absolutely at peace in
each other's silence
True love just happens
to join into my life
naturally and effortlessly
Without a struggle, uncertainty,
and no fear whatsoever
Of course there's respect,
trust, and lust
I believe true love
without a shadow of a doubt
will be satisfied and so absolutely sure
that all those things will come as natural
as breathing
<3
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