I Like Being Single Part 2: Dedicated to the Serial Daters & Boys Who Treat Girls Like Pez

Sorry! I just can't stop writing.  Today I've posted an affirmation on Facebook that I've wanted to post on here and expand:

Truth: I'd rather be single any day than be in a relationship that's built on guilt, convenience, or fear of being alone.

Honestly, I would love to make a song out of this but anyway here's a more deeper take of this realization that's been running through my head lately.  

GUILT: 

Don't and I repeat don't ever get into a relationship because you feel like you owe it to that person. You don't owe anything to anyone until you are truly ready to give without any fear or resentment. Especially if you've cheated on that person or thought about cheating.  If you do have these feelings then that person isn't the one for you. Being in a relationship out of guilt will only lead you to resenting that person because everything will be done out of obligation and not priority.  On the other side of the coin, if you feel like whoever you are dating isn't ready to fully commit, then don't force them into something that you know they don't really want or don't let them commit if you feel there's any slight of hesitation.  I've learned this the hard way.  I knew my ex wasn't ready to start a whole new relationship but the fact that he asked me fueled my ego into saying yes, when deep down inside I knew he wasn't ready but for some reason I didn't think I was strong enough to be on my own.  Also my fear of rejection took over as well. In the end I was rejected anyways because he wasn't being true to himself and neither was I.  I've learned that true love never has second doubts or shame, it should be a loud and proud.

CONVENIENCE:

I know there's couples out there that are only together because that's all they know.  They're not even in love anymore but they've been together for so long that it's scary to even think to start over.  However, it's not true love if you're with this person because rent is cheaper that way, or there's a warm body in bed.  If you're not even enjoying that person in your life anymore, then why are you even with them? They are only holding you back from what you really want, a connection, a desire, an appreciation of who you are.  Most of these kinds of couples barely have anything to say to each other and when they do it's mostly arguments of the same shit over and over again.  If you're unhappy and shit is not getting better then you owe it to yourself to get the fuck out.  I know that it's easier said than done, but the more you wait the harder it will become.

FEAR OF BEING ALONE:

I mean it's self explanatory.  Pretty much all these feelings stems from not wanting to be alone.  But we owe it to ourselves to really figure out who and what the fuck we want in our lives.  If you just start some random relationship with someone out of lonliness, YOU ARE SETTLING. Pretty soon down the road you'll figure out this person is completely wrong for you.  You've basically wasted your precious time and energy from figuring out who you are and what you deserve.  If you're alone, that's great! Enjoy it, because sooner or later you'll find someone to get on your nerves and then you'll miss those days of pickin' and choosin' or keeping it movin'.  

Ultimately, being Single for a while is the only gateway drug to true happiness. Love yourself better, then you will find yourself a better lover.